Becky Jean

Self absorbed rambling

I’m glad we’re over. You’re not who I thought you were, and I’m not who I am when I was with you. You never made me better. You held me back from who I am supposed to be. You always would have, you brought out the lazy part of me, the part that wants the safe, easy, conventional path, but I’m destined for the winding, troubled, dangerous path. I feel it in my bones, I feel it in my soul. I’m still learning but it stirs in me, wild for its destiny. Profundity lies in me, watching the pink fade from the sky in a foreign city, I know that I’m untamed in a way you never will be. My soul sings in adventure, while I’m not sure yours ever does. I have more depth and poems and flowers in my soul than you can comprehend. Thank you for ripping that safety away, what I loved in you was consistency, and the constant promise of welcoming arms. Those arms embracing another elucidates that I’m not meant for such smothering arms. One day a soul will soar with me rather hold me back from the wild dreams and great unknown I yearn to explore. My sun tanned face grins at the promise of the open future you gave me back with a slap in the face. It was the wake up call to destiny I needed. I advance in beauty, in wonder, all over the globe while you sit stationary. You pride yourself on knowing who you are while I find joy in that I’ll never fully know myself. I’m too untamed, too wild, to ever know exactly who I am. Thousands of years of exploration and lust for life exist behind my eyes, things in me you’ll never see. Your callous heart spurned me but I’m the lucky one, the one exploring new people, real emotions, the whole wild world you’ll never see. You’ll never see the real me, and you’ll never see outside the tiny corner of safety and fear you inhabit, but luckily you set me free.